“The problem comes when we find ourselves in a relationship and we are constantly comparing our partners with this conjured-up ‘perfect’ person. When that happens, we stop appreciating our partner for all the beautiful qualities they do possess “. (How To Find True Love by Tina Su)
We’ve all had the experience of loss; of jobs, finances, friends, and relationships. Losing a relationship with someone you love is so very difficult. Regardless of our culture, our level of education or economic status, at the depth of all of us are the same desires to love, to be loved, and to be happy. If love is so fundamentally important to us then why do we have such a difficult time finding it and holding on to it? For many of us it’s been an adventure in trial and error and learning through heartbreak.
If we truly want to find that special someone and have that ‘once in a lifetime’ relationship with the person we’re meant to be with then some research needed to be done on this subject and now!
There are truly good people out there; but this doesn’t mean that two good people will make a good partnership. The best fit, I have read, is the fit where most important values for both people are met. Their life goals, mutual attraction, understanding, and level of respect for each other have to be aligned. Both people must make the commitment to the relationship their top priority.
Another very important issue in becoming a quality partner in a relationship is ‘loving yourself’! We first have to love ourselves before we can love someone else. When you love yourself you are so much more attractive to the outside world.
I love this analogy; “imagine each person in a relationship as a wooden stick. If one person is independent and the other is dependent, it’s like one stick is standing perfectly vertical and the second stick is leaning against the vertical stick. If the vertical stick moves horizontally, the leaning stick will fall. When two people are both independent and joined together through love, it’s like two sticks standing vertically. When they join together, they become a larger and stronger stick and they become interdependent and stronger. If one stick moves horizontally, the other stick will move with it”.
As it is with so many things of the heart, there is that one ingredient which is the ‘magic’ in finding love. I believe there are no coincidences. Love is beautiful and unpredictable. The universe will know when we are ready and when we are, true love will happen unexpectedly. I believe this!