Anger; that dreaded emotion that we all experience and most of us make every effort to control. It is such a powerful emotion and overtakes the best of us causing regrets of such enormous proportion.
On so many occasions, after someone has given in to their anger, they will reflect and say “if only I had not become so angry”! This evil enemy has caused such heartache, sadness and even death to its victims and perpetrators.
Have you ever realized how the body prepares or reacts when angry? “The brain shunts blood away from the gut and towards the muscles, in preparation for physical exertion. Heart rate, blood pressure and respiration increase, the body temperature rises and the skin perspires. The mind is sharpened and focused.” quoted from http://www.BetterHealth.vic.gov
All this constant flood of stress chemicals associated with metabolic changes that go with unmanaged anger causes so much harm to several parts of our bodies.
Most of us already know what anger does to us physically; headaches, high blood pressure, sweating, muscle tensing, trembling, etc. In the very worst case, heart attack or stroke.
We adults already know what we need to do to control this anger within us but more importantly to me is this; how can we teach our children to deal with or express their anger?
- We have to lead by example
- Let children know that anger is a normal emotion BUT should and can be expressed in an appropriate way
- Treat YOUR child’s anger and feeling with respect
- Teach the child practical ways of solving problems
- Encourage open and honest communications with your child in your home
- Allow them to express their anger but in an appropriate way
- Explain to the child the difference between anger and aggression
- Punish aggression and violence if your child displays this but do not punish with an aggressive act.
- Do not punish when they express their anger appropriately
- Teach your child appropriate ways to calm or sooth themselves.
We all have to realize that we are only human and not perfect people. Anger is a natural response and it Is Going To Happen to us. As long as we are ready and can realize all the negative results that will come from out of control anger, then we are a step ahead.
Most reasonable people regret the anger after is has reared its ugly head. We want to go back and change our response or actions but we cannot. If we can only remember this feeling when we are ‘in the moment’ then we will win over this enemy of anger we face.
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