There are certainly times in our lives when transformations are taking place. They might be taking place in various areas of our lives at the same time which can be very difficult if not even traumatic.
On this day I have some men in my yard adding wooden links to an existing fence. Last summer my former asphalt driveway was replaced with a very nice light coloured cement one but the contractors created a 12 inch step up to an existing sidewalk, causing me to decide to put a doorway in this location. My fear was that someone would come walking along the sidewalk and not see the step down, taking a disastrous fall. This transformation was definitely not expected to be necessary but the alternative would have been very bad! In the long-run I will have an attractive fence and gate.
So many other transformations in our lives can be traumatic, like the loss of a loved one to an illness or accident, separation or divorce, loss of a job, or loss of a pet!
There are five stages that often take place when we experience loss and grief. They are; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Here are some myths about dealing with loss and depression;
Myths and facts about grief
MYTH: The pain will go away faster if you ignore it.
Fact: Trying to ignore your pain or keep it from surfacing will only make it worse in the long run. For real healing it is necessary to face your grief and actively deal with it.
MYTH: It’s important to be “be strong” in the face of loss.
Fact: Feeling sad, frightened, or lonely is a normal reaction to loss. Crying doesn’t mean you are weak. You don’t need to “protect” your family or friends by putting on a brave front. Showing your true feelings can help them and you.
MYTH: If you don’t cry, it means you aren’t sorry about the loss.
Fact: Crying is a normal response to sadness, but it’s not the only one. Those who don’t cry may feel the pain just as deeply as others. They may simply have other ways of showing it.
MYTH: Grief should last about a year.
Fact: There is no right or wrong time frame for grieving. How long it takes can differ from person to person.
Source: Center for Grief and Healing
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